DDIY 35 - Prenuptial Eagle!

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Wikihows:

How to smoke a cigarette in Paris. How to ask your parents about puberty. How to decide who gets the pet in a divorce.

Discussed: 

Curly wig condoms, smoking baguettes, french in a southern accent, bilingual kissing sister-brothers, Elvira and condoms, puberty supplies, Prenuptial Eagle, divorce clause claws, Bar King the drunk dog, cholo eagle.

Wikihows Covered

How to smoke a cigarette in Paris

http://www.wikihow.com/Smoke-a-Cigarette-in-Paris

How to ask your parents about puberty

http://www.wikihow.com/Ask-Parents-About-Puberty

How to decide who gets the pet in a divorce

http://www.wikihow.com/Decide-Who-Gets-the-Pet-in-a-Divorce

Get your own Book of Runes!

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DDIY 34 (w/ Michael Alm) - Consult the Runes, Ghostfucker

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This week we are joined by the amazingly talented artist Michael Alm (http://www.michaelalm.com/) , so of course we squander his knowledge and talk to him exclusively about ghosts and the paranormal. Instead of a Wikihow, Michael brings in runes which we use to solve some wikihows. The runes apparently want Mike gay and pregnant, and for us to bang the ghosts out of homes for fun and profit. This might be my favorite episode. 

Wikihows Covered

How to Resolve a Poltergeist

http://www.wikihow.com/Resolve-a-Poltergeist

How to Avoid Encounters with Ghosts and the Paranormal (Runic Edition)

http://www.wikihow.com/Avoid-Encounters-With-Ghosts-and-the-Paranormal

How to Get a Ghost Out of Your House (Runic Edition)

http://www.wikihow.com/Get-a-Ghost-out-of-Your-House

Get your own Book of Runes!

Stitcher Link?: Gotcha

iTunes Link?  Yessir

Need Our RSS feed? Here it is. I imagine Ghostfuckers.com is taken, but I'm scared to check.

DDIY 33 - Real Doll Police Party

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Cops and parties don’t mix. So how do you stop the fuzz from breaking up your recreation of House Party? Easy, pretend it was ghosts. Or cats. Or that you are having a Real Doll party for one. Or just leave and never look back. We talk about this, how to cope with commercials (also, dear police, we promise if Flo dies this week that it wasn’t Mike) and finally how to convince your girlfriend that you are the sweetest guy she’s ever known. Well, Mike and Zac do. Clay tips his hand once more that he’s kind of the worst. This, plus we talk about Multiplicity.

WikiHows:

How to Deal with the Police When They Come to Your Door at a Party

http://www.wikihow.com/Deal-With-the-Police-when-They-Come-to-Your-Door-at-a-Party

How to Cope with Commercials

http://www.wikihow.com/Cope-With-Commercials

How to Convince Your Girlfriend That You Are the Sweetest Guy She's Ever Known

http://www.wikihow.com/Convince-Your-Girlfriend-That-You-Are-the-Sweetest-Guy-She's-Ever-Known

Stitcher Link?: Gotcha

iTunes Link?  Yessir

Need Our RSS feed? Here it is. Beware the Mad Ad-der.

DDIY 32 - Geriatric Panopticon

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Today we actually give our most actionable advice. For instance, the best way to insult someone you are going to fight? Read their Facebook statuses out loud. Best way to have a horse? Don't, just work for Horse Minutes. Do you know how many HMPG (Horse Minutes Per Gallon) you get? We have a very convoluted mathematical solution for you that involves worm seconds and dog years. Want to make sure your grandma is ok? Send her to the Panopticon Retirement Home and rest easy that there are always eyes on her. Always.

WikiHows:

How to Trash Talk

http://www.wikihow.com/Trash-Talk

How to Buy a Horse

http://www.wikihow.com/Buy-a-Horse

How to Spy on Neighbors

http://www.wikihow.com/Spy-on-Neighbors

Stitcher Link?: Gotcha

iTunes Link?  Yessir

Need Our RSS feed? Here it is. Chandra's nightmare is a horse with boobs.

DDIY 31 - Smoochosaurus Rex

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How to Kiss Your Crush Out of the Blue. How to Stop A Wedding. How To Wrap a Cat. All of these are addressed in this episode. Normally, we take notes while editing so we can have a funny little blurb. Clay's notes for editing on this episode are "im drunk this episode is good". If that's not enough to entice you, we also say all of the following things about our beloved in an effort to convince them that they should leave their betrothed:

(You have) supple breasts and a soft behind. (You have) supple breasts and a fine behind. (I desire) supple breasts and that sweet booty. (You have) supple breasts and a sweet backside.

WikiHows:

How to Kiss Your Crush Out of the Blue

http://www.wikihow.com/Kiss-Your-Crush-out-of-the-Blue

How to Stop a Wedding

http://www.wikihow.com/Stop-a-Wedding

How to Wrap a Cat

http://www.wikihow.com/Wrap-a-Cat

Stitcher Link?: Gotcha

iTunes Link?  Yessir

Need Our RSS feed? Here it is. You have supple breasts and a sweet booty.